there are a lot of mysteries in the world ancient ruins and old legends that are passed down from generation to generation but i think the most mysterious one of all is where miss mel went
[ he's just being annoying, but maybe it's his way of checking in.
he blames the imprint. after one second of waiting, he'll send one more message. ]
[ Her phone goes off twice in rapid succession, so she doesn't have much time to initially respond while she's wiping her hands off from the paint she's using. Initially, she assumes it's trouble, so she's quick to grab her device up and check. And she's...greeted by a picture of a duck?
But seeing the username, flicks over to type something back. ]
No mystery there, I'm right here. Where are you? Are you all right?
[ the fact that she can recall all of that probably meant she wasn’t either, but even that’s not really a comfort. ]
id be more concerned about a certain someone who seems to have a habit of spreading herself too thin actually
[ a joke. but, that’s the vibe he got from their previous encounters. like she spent too much time considering all the variables and how to navigate not just her own feelings but other people’s, as well. he supposed it was evident even in the grace she showed him. ]
[ She has something to say about 'the same as always', though she keeps it to herself for the time being. The truth is that she doesn't think anyone walked away from the past few weeks unchanged, unless they truly had no feeling for it. Regardless, ]
How terrible. It sounds like you know someone pretty irresponsible.
[ Look, she can poke fun at herself. ]
I'm fine, if that's what you're asking. I didn't spend a week being torn apart by scientists only to have my memories taken.
how you feel about them huh is that more of burden to yourself or them
[ it's less punitive, and more... curious. ]
i think the process of allowing someone into your world can be a huge burden on them like they say what people see is usually just the tip of the iceberg
maybe if people also see beyond all of that theres no guarantee theyll like it
Do you think it's a burden even if that's what they asked for?
If someone comes to you, for instance, and says they want to know you, all of you, the real you... Is it still a burden to them if they look behind the curtain, even if that's what they asked for?
[ Of course there's never a guarantee that people will like what's on offer. That's part of the risk. Does someone like you for the mask you wear, the front you display, or are they truly interested in the person that's beneath? And will they know the answer without allowing for that risk to be taken? ]
[ Her thoughts stray, of course, to Jayce and Viktor. For all that she knows they care so much for one another, they still circle some of the most difficult of conversations, back and forth, push and pull. She can't say if it's a lack of acceptance in each other or if it's stubbornness. And her? She can hardly stand herself these days; it's hard to ask anyone to accept all of the pieces she hides away.
Mel sighs as she types back. ]
Of course it's easy to make promises like that, that you will accept someone wholly as themselves regardless of who and what they are. It's the same as telling someone 'I'll do everything I can' or 'I won't let anyone hurt you.'
[ Promises that can't be kept, good intentions or not. ]
I think there are people out there who want to accept the people around them wholly. I think they try. But we are human and prone to mistakes.
[ despite defaulting to the notion that no one could possibly understand him. he somehow gets the impression, at least from her words, that she may have not know him specifically, but she understood the words he speaks all too well. perhaps, experience speaks volumes.
it's equal parts poignant, and thought, and .... also a bit unnerving for him. ]
i think that might be the problem actually
[ that they're humans.
not that he believes lemurians to be as flawless of a society as rumors and age old tales tell, but that they were intrinsically different from humans. isn't that why why their home was regaled as an utopia? ]
[ That's an odd way of framing it, she thinks, and she holds on to that for another time. Likely Rafayel won't appreciate being prodded about it. ]
I am not a very accepting or trusting creature. I don't expect others to accept me. I try to only understand.
[ It would nice to be seen for who she is, flaws and all, and to be acknowledged. It would be nice if someone would be able to do that for her. But she can't promise the same back to them and she knows there is plenty about her that is unlovable. It's too much to ask of others. ]
Is there someone you wish would be like that towards you?
I can think of a few. But perhaps being understood is still a part of what they want.
[ Her mother's ambition and thirst for legacy; Silco's desire to destroy the system that's taken from him. She can see, if shifted and looked through a different light and lens, how that would look like wanting to be seen for how they wish to be understood. Still. ]
You're an artist, Rafayel. You know what it means to see things, to see people, as they are.
[ It's a type of understanding. And, in a way, it's a kind of acceptance too: to see a person or a place for all they are, all they were, and all they could be. ]
maybe but sometimes we see things maybe we arent meant to
[ ... and he knows from seeing the depth of human cruelty, he isn't sure if he can ever reconcile those differences. not that he holds contempt for every human, but that his own feelings were as murky and chaotic as the deep seas. ]
but id like to think youre right even criticism is another form of understanding
this got kind of serious but i guess what im saying is
[ that he might have trusted in her words, just a little. ]
i wasnt lying when i said id help you if you needed aaand just in case you forgot youre an artist too miss mel
[ He isn’t wrong about that. And in a world where people can be made into animals and monsters, and monsters so readily masquerade as human, it’s difficult to reconcile what she’s seen and understood with how she wishes things would be. For all that she’s seen the darkness of people’s hearts in her home as well as in Piltover… Well, perhaps hope springs eternal. Or perhaps she’s still deluded enough to think she can control the situation.
A fact she knows isn’t true in the slightest. ]
I also seem to recall you helped me previously. Kept me safe, even.
[ He can call it what he wants but she knows what she saw. ]
[ It was only two, nearly three short months ago, and yet... And yet, it feels like everything's changed since. ]
Yes. He's going to have an art gallery. I imagine he's looking for work to display. You could have some of your work up and maybe for sale. I haven't seen anything of yours yet, by the way, and I'd still like to.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
backdated by just a few days.
ancient ruins and old legends that are passed down from generation to generation but i think the most mysterious one of all is where miss mel went
[ he's just being annoying, but maybe it's his way of checking in.
he blames the imprint. after one second of waiting, he'll send one more message. ]
!!!
But seeing the username, flicks over to type something back. ]
No mystery there, I'm right here.
Where are you? Are you all right?
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i thought i received a message from her just now
but thats like impossible
[ okay, he’s done being difficult. just give him a few minutes. ]
i wasnt taken if thats what you were worried about
im here
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That is, in fact, what I was worried about.
I didn't see you in those cages but that doesn't mean anything in a place like this.
[ Not anymore. ]
How are you?
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[ the fact that she can recall all of that probably meant she wasn’t either, but even that’s not really a comfort. ]
id be more concerned about a certain someone who seems to have a habit of spreading herself too thin actually
[ a joke. but, that’s the vibe he got from their previous encounters. like she spent too much time considering all the variables and how to navigate not just her own feelings but other people’s, as well. he supposed it was evident even in the grace she showed him. ]
no subject
How terrible. It sounds like you know someone pretty irresponsible.
[ Look, she can poke fun at herself. ]
I'm fine, if that's what you're asking. I didn't spend a week being torn apart by scientists only to have my memories taken.
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someones gotta be the mature adult here
[ it's not actually him.
but, her touch of humor in return does alleviate some of his concerns. ]
yeah same here
i think the fact we can both say this means we werent part of it
but sometimes thats hard too [ hard in a different way. ]
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I imagine people you cared for were taken, the same as me, and there was so little we could do.
[ Whether he chooses to call them that is up to him. ]
The amount of control those people have over us is [ Horrifying. ] infuriating.
It can't happen again.
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i agree
but sometimes the more you lay out your cards
the more dangerous it is
its not a burden for everyone
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The more you show your hand, the more vulnerable you are.
[ The easier one can know what you're hiding, what you're holding, what you're willing to give up. ]
I don't think the presence of others or bonds with them are a burden.
[ She thinks her feelings are, however. ]
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you sound so convinced
but i cant imagine youre the type to share whats on your mind either
juuuust an observation tho
[ he knows he's not any better. ]
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How I feel about them is.
[ She can be honest about that much, even if that's...not actually sharing what's on her mind. ]
Do you feel differently, that people and their attachments can be burdensome?
[ A genuine question, though text might make it hard to see it that way. ]
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is that more of burden to yourself or them
[ it's less punitive, and more... curious. ]
i think the process of allowing someone into your world can be a huge burden on them like they say what people see is usually just the tip of the iceberg
maybe if people also see beyond all of that
theres no guarantee theyll like it
no subject
If someone comes to you, for instance, and says they want to know you, all of you, the real you...
Is it still a burden to them if they look behind the curtain, even if that's what they asked for?
[ Of course there's never a guarantee that people will like what's on offer. That's part of the risk. Does someone like you for the mask you wear, the front you display, or are they truly interested in the person that's beneath? And will they know the answer without allowing for that risk to be taken? ]
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even if they turned away no one could blame them
besides do you think someone like that is out there
is that a risk you would take
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Mel sighs as she types back. ]
Of course it's easy to make promises like that, that you will accept someone wholly as themselves regardless of who and what they are. It's the same as telling someone 'I'll do everything I can' or 'I won't let anyone hurt you.'
[ Promises that can't be kept, good intentions or not. ]
I think there are people out there who want to accept the people around them wholly. I think they try. But we are human and prone to mistakes.
Is it a risk you would take, Rafayel?
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it's equal parts poignant, and thought, and .... also a bit unnerving for him. ]
i think that might be the problem actually
[ that they're humans.
not that he believes lemurians to be as flawless of a society as rumors and age old tales tell, but that they were intrinsically different from humans. isn't that why why their home was regaled as an utopia? ]
that depends on who its with
are you trying
no subject
I am not a very accepting or trusting creature. I don't expect others to accept me. I try to only understand.
[ It would nice to be seen for who she is, flaws and all, and to be acknowledged. It would be nice if someone would be able to do that for her. But she can't promise the same back to them and she knows there is plenty about her that is unlovable. It's too much to ask of others. ]
Is there someone you wish would be like that towards you?
no subject
because in the end the other person probably isnt thinking about being accepted anyway
[ isn't it enough not to be hated?
he thinks it and yet he isn't sure if that's what he really means.
at the question— ]
no but is there anyone who doesnt want to be understood
no subject
[ Her mother's ambition and thirst for legacy; Silco's desire to destroy the system that's taken from him. She can see, if shifted and looked through a different light and lens, how that would look like wanting to be seen for how they wish to be understood. Still. ]
You're an artist, Rafayel.
You know what it means to see things, to see people, as they are.
[ It's a type of understanding. And, in a way, it's a kind of acceptance too: to see a person or a place for all they are, all they were, and all they could be. ]
no subject
but sometimes we see things maybe we arent meant to
[ ... and he knows from seeing the depth of human cruelty, he isn't sure if he can ever reconcile those differences. not that he holds contempt for every human, but that his own feelings were as murky and chaotic as the deep seas. ]
but id like to think youre right
even criticism is another form of understanding
this got kind of serious but i guess what im saying is
[ that he might have trusted in her words, just a little. ]
i wasnt lying when i said id help you if you needed
aaand just in case you forgot youre an artist too miss mel
no subject
A fact she knows isn’t true in the slightest. ]
I also seem to recall you helped me previously. Kept me safe, even.
[ He can call it what he wants but she knows what she saw. ]
Have you met Hugo, by any chance?
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not that he hasn't ever helped others, but that he's never felt so spotlighted on it until now. ]
if i recall its because a certain someone was pretty set on saving the city
i couldnt exactly leave her behind
[ is all he'll say to that, but at this moment he's pretty glad this isn't in person. it's also why he welcomes the sudden question. ]
i have
youre asking because of his interest in the arts right
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[ It was only two, nearly three short months ago, and yet... And yet, it feels like everything's changed since. ]
Yes. He's going to have an art gallery.
I imagine he's looking for work to display.
You could have some of your work up and maybe for sale.
I haven't seen anything of yours yet, by the way, and I'd still like to.
no subject
well it wasnt too hard
[ it really does... ]
yeah he seemed passionate
even tho i cant tell if the vampire thing is like a bit
i dun show just anyone my art
but if its miss mel i could show her a thing or two yeah
im curious if youve created something new too
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